Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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