I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Randomize
