Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
