is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
