That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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