Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
