Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
