So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Sorry about my life...
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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