What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
