i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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