All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
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