No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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