i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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