brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
