i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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