I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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