Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Randomize
