I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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