nut hugger
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
