All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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