There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
