when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
this is an emotional support booty call
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
