nut hugger
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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