youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
