Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
