I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
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