so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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