Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
