Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
