this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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