Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
