dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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