I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
