we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
