Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
