you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize