Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
