dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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