Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I will be naked everywhere
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
