He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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