I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
