shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
