the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
