I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
