Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
She bit a glass in half.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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