office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
