it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
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