But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize