Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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