My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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