week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
