Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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