What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
